Welcome to my little scattered brain indecisive world…. and now, accompanying blog post.
Normally I build a blog post around a start and end to something I’ve experienced, as a means of inspiring another that may need to travel the same road. However, (at the moment I’m writing this) this is not the case.
Nope. I don’t have it all together. Are you surprised?
Bike Ride Adventure Posts
What a weird year. Summer? Most of you know I’ve been going through some life changes lately.
But I will say, so many new wonderful discoveries were made. My endless hot summer bike rides were a welcomed adventure. If I felt directionally challenged on a given day, it was always a relief to glance at the clock and ‘feel’ it was time to head out without even thinking about it.
The structure of that part felt safe and secure. Like I DID have it all together.
But then there’s the rest of the day.
Vision me standing in the middle of a room with no walls and big puffy ballon like question marks gravitating above my head.
And I think my creativity was floating above the question marks as far as outer space!
I also stopped making hard decisions. Because nothing felt right. So imagined that on repeat and getting buried…
What did help keep me moving along is when things became urgent. There is something to be said about the pressure to perform! But then… crisis diverted, the dust motes settled in once again, and… oh boy.
Let’s just go on another bike ride. It’s 6:00 pm somewhere, right?
Among my overworked / underworked mind, I’ve also been experiencing some transitioning personal and career plans. One story I can’t wait to share involves my travel trailer. I fretted the entire way through it until clarity dropped in my lap like a bomb right at the 11th hour. My head is still spinning.
So! If you’re into following the lost, boy am I’m your girl.
I told my therapist that I felt I had an indecision problem. To my complete surprise, she questioned whether it was a problem at all. That perhaps I’m just too overwhelmed with everything at the same time, so instead of making potential mistakes, I’m hanging tough until there’s clarity…
I like my therapist more and more with each passing day.
However, there is one big move I made last night that gave me the final push to get this post out there, because it proved the entire point of this post.
Thank-you clarity.
With credit card in hand and my computer monitor working overtime (with 50 million tabs open), I bit the bullet. In mid October I’m off to my very fav island for a short-to-me stint, with a bonus new adventure added in!
Hint… 450 cats under a palm tree… SQUEEEEEE…
Yup! Taking in Maui PLUS new-to-me Lanai (to visit a cat retreat) for an additional 3 day stint. All this was a very hard decision, months in the making. Is it the right time? What’s stopping me? I wrote out a big ‘ol pros and cons list, right down to dates, and this just felt right.
So I booked in a little relaxation PLUS a new adventure so I can keep growing. Because the travel fear bug really has to check the heck out if I’m ever gonna get off North America one day.
Patience…
And here’s why our gut sometimes tells us to just wait at times. Ready for it?
I was elbow deep in the middle of 3 condo bookings, 2 flights, 2 vehicles, and a ferry ride, when I remembered my sis going sometime in fall, but I wasn’t sure when. I messaged her asking when. No answer. No answer. No answer. I had to finally just book. Drat. Oh well. I felt I was a month out.
And then she answered. I was going RIGHT before her, and she’d be there after I left.
In the same condo of course.
Speechless.
Part of my delay on even going at all was being all on my own when I was in this weird state of mind. I knew I needed it, but I couldn’t relax, yet I couldn’t focus on work. Nothing felt right yet.
When I went last Christmas on my own, the first week was REALLY tough, even though the 2nd week was pure magic.
But I didn’t want to go again to just struggle.
But traveling with someone you know changes things. Michael from Inspired By Charm came to Maui last summer which was like a little miracle in itself. My son was also there too.
I’ve been trying to tag my sis to travel with me, but it’s never worked out.
But now it has.
Tropical garden tour in Maui
I guess that was a long winded way of saying some life chapters are just flat out muddy and confusing. You think you aren’t doing a darn tootin’ thing doing nothing, when really you’re unknowingly probably very hard at work even if it is ‘just waiting’.
Patience is apparently the key.
All I know is, thank goodness for some meandering mindless indecisiveness. AND for the Big Guy in the Sky for having my indecisive planning set in stone LONG before I even knew about it!
Guess it goes without saying, my heavy mood has been ditched, huh?
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Are you indecisive too? How do you deal with it?
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Read more Therapy 101 Posts HERE
This is great news Donna. I find that sometimes we can be indecisive and without us knowing the reason why, when that right decision comes along we grab it. It is all a matter of timing, or the universe coming together to make it all happen for us. And what is this about a cat retreat? I’ve never heard of such a thing. If you want the real deal you can come to Greece, there are cats everywhere.
I admit visiting Greece sounds nice too! However I need to work my way up to that bravery. haha
Here’s the cat sanctuary website:
http://lanaicatsanctuary.org/
All the time I’m afraid right now. Maybe it’s an age thing or maybe the stars are misaligned for a little bit, either way, sometimes it feels like all the things I thought I knew are now unknown. I’m so happy that your stars and that the BIG guy in the sky have come together. Enjoy your trip and your sister and all those purr babies Donna.
How interesting, Michelle!
Changing circumstances for the most part have left me feeling so up in the air. Finding the new norm is not for the faint of heart, is it?
All we can really do is one day at a time I guess!
And I thought your other get away to the little cabin was such a treat!! Sounds like Maui would be wonderful. I would love to have the money and courage to do something like this on my own. Good luck to you. I’m sure it will turn out to be a time of renewal for you and your sister.
That cabin stay truly saved my adventurous spirit! It helped rejuvenate what I love about living here so much… and made me even more aware of the possibility that something along those lines may become a little more permanent in the future.
However, it was a little ‘too safe’ for that to be the only thing and bypass what my spirit yearns for.
I’ve learned over the years that if I don’t listen, I become a prisoner to my own actions.
p.s. I save for things like this, bypassing other things I could/should? get instead. haha
You have worked so hard trying to convince yourself that you were okay with not going on a vacation, other than your getaway on the river! It didn’t work.
Have a wonderful time. So glad the timing worked out with your sister’s plans. You are getting the vacation you have really wanted all along!
Laughing! You are SO right Brenda. Nothing worked. I did my best. haha
I’m afraid adventure is just embedded in me. My gut says it’s just part of something larger.
I’d like to become more adventurous nearer to where I live too. This was just the summer I needed to be home.
HI Donna,
That is wonderful news, you are going to Maui!! Have a wonderful and enlightening time. 🙂
Oh yes I can be very indecisive. I am currently in what I call, the analysis paralysis mode….I just research, make lists of pros and cons, research some more,,,,and actually make no decision because it just doesn’t feel right yet. I deal with it by reminding myself,,,, I do not have to decide just yet,,,,breathe and meditate and pray on it.
It is a struggle….but it is okay to struggle.
Waiting patiently to hear about the travel trailer,,,,,as that is where I am struggling these days…. do I buy one and hit the open road?
It’s hard to give yourself permission to struggle, but it’s a human trait! The key for me has been to sink into all the tips I’ve learned from my classes and therapist… make a list, and tackle the things you CAN accomplish quickly. You’ll feel so much more in control of things.
p.s. another trick I play on myself is pretend I am helping someone else with my problem. Then follow my own advice. It’s so much easier to give advice than to take it! haha
Ohhh, the travel trailer subject sounds so real. I thought I’d do that too at one point, but an unreliable truck scratched that one off the list!
it is a tough one…i think when we truly listen to our heart we know the answer.
sometimes second guessing a “want” or new path out of fear or maybe it does not look like anyone else’s path. I’m not completely sure, but i have questioned my ideas and then I think why not!
i’m so excited for you to experience a new chapter in your life
“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.”
~Helen Keller
good one to post in a spot you see everyday, xo
I have never heard of a cat retreat, but I kind-a think I like the idea. A bunch of cats I don’t necessarily have to take care of, but who want to snuggle and be my BFF, a little unconditional love. But as far as making decisions…. I don’t know, I don’t think I’m indecisive, but maybe I am. I can’t decide.
I’m personally sure that you know how to make me laugh!
Wow, I never would have guessed you were indecisive about anything! I visit your site on occasion when I need inspiration and share your projects with friends and family. I imagined you always had a plan or we’re just innately knowledgeable about what colors go where. Or lucky as heck that everything you do just becomes automatically awesome. I’d take a smidgeon of any of it. Thank you for sharing. I’ll continue to follow your processes in hope that I, too, may find clarity…and Hawaii!
Oh yeah, I’ve always stalled a little too long with major decisions. Small decisions keep me busy and distracted from the tougher ones I suppose! haha Nice to get confirmation from another that it’s generally a legit stall though!